Last night I had a minor life "episode". I call them that, just a thing that gets me to thinking, nothing serious. You know, those little life "episodes" with family members, neighbors, co-workers, friends, etc. (life is messy, if you aren't having these .... are you breathing?)
Lately I've been spending a bit of time thinking and asking myself "why". Why did I react that way or think that thought. Not in judgement, more in curiosity.
If you're like me and life hasn't always been a bed of roses, some times we get emotional torrets. Habitual emotional responses. Like a computer, we get wired up into patterns. Like a computer, we can rewire it. Code it different. To do different. Thus the asking.
And let's be honest
, figuring out what's your stuff and what's not can be super fun. NOT. It can drive you bat shit crazy.
Thus the need to meditate - have the ability to think/feel/know clearly when you ask yourself an inner question.
So in last nights "episode", I was asking myself questions. And this morning my inner rockstar
said these things to me. The pink stickies.
I love stickies. I talk to myself all the time through the stickies. They help me stay focused on what's TRUTH
One last thought...I worked with a coach once that said...you have two wolves in ya. They battle each other. The white (pure one - the one that's WHOLE AND ALWAYS HAS BEEN AND IS NOW) wolf is being devoured by the dark one. The lies that we believe. Such as we aren't enough. Let's face it, say if you were abused when you were a child...the lie of being "not good enough" would be a strong dark wolf, that over powers the white one.
So in asking the questions. Seeing that this internal battle is there. For one. Gives us power. Because the endless battle is GREATLY STRESSFUL. And leads to other battles. More stress.
And this tires us out. And runs us down. This inner stress causes the adrenal glands to work overtime. They get RUN DOWN! They don't work well. They get "fatigued". They get "exhausted". They "SHRINK". For good. Side thought: so imagine, if you are that child...starting out with this "stuff" going on. You get to 40 or whatever and you've been living with adrenal gland deficiency ALL YOUR LIFE...
You saw the list on adrenal gland stresses. A lot of... emotional stuff.
Be curious about your thoughts.
Know that they don't have to control you.
Know that they are incredibly powerful.
Ask why why why
until you know "oh, that's it." Write it down in your journal. On a stickie.